Chuck and I read the book, “Love and Respect” not too long ago, which is a good book on marriage. In his book the author talks about “the crazy cycle”. His version of “the crazy cycle” has to do with fighting and arguing, but I liked the phrase so I’m going to borrow it. The way I described being consumed with fear in my last post is my own version of the crazy cycle. I do feel like I’m going crazy sometimes when I’m consumed with fear. 

The thing about fear is that I believe it’s one of those pardonable sins. It’s under the surface, it’s hidden, it’s not something I have sensed Christians fighting against like we do against other sins. The consequences of fear are great, but not necessarily easy to put a finger on. As I’ve realized this, I have begun to fight back. I have begun to say NO to fear, and God has been helping me move forward. 

During my last huge crazy cycle about the lump in Jase’s neck, I learned a few valuable lessons. I don’t believe there are “three steps to a peaceful life”, but there are definitely steps that have helped me lately. I may always struggle with fear, but I refuse to believe fear will consume me for the rest of my life. Jesus died so that I could live FREE from fear! I claim that Truth, and I claim it often. 

Step 1: I admitted out loud to Chuck and my Mom that I was very, very afraid. At first I was really embarrassed to admit I was still consumed with the lump on Jase’s neck even though the doctor already said it was normal. I didn’t want to tell them my fear because I felt so silly. I believe that’s what the enemy wants me to believe- the lie that I should be ashamed. Shame is a tool of the enemy that keeps me from being honest about my struggles. He wants me to keep my fear hidden, but God wants me to live free! When I finally admitted my fear out loud, it didn’t seem as scary. I was no longer suffering alone in my head, but I had others to support me and speak Truth to me. The light began to fill me when I spoke my fear out loud to others. 

Step 2: Instead of saying verses over and over about fear, I began to memorize verses about peace and light. Many verses say, “do not fear” but the more I told myself not to fear, the more fearful I was! So my Mom suggested taking my focus off of the fear, and putting that focus on something else. The first verse I chose was Galatians 5:22-23, “But the fruit that comes from having the Holy Spirit in our lives is love, joy, PEACE…”. When my focus shifted to peace, more light began to fill me. 

Step 3: Worship music! Ohhhhh how I love worship music! One of my greatest joys in life is celebrating who Jesus is by singing, and by listening to others sing. God has given me some amazing songs that have spoken directly to my soul- especially in the midst of my most recent crazy cycle. For Christmas my in-laws gave me a really great album called, “You Make Me Brave” by Bethel Live. I had been playing it in my car so I had slowly gotten to know some of the songs, but hadn’t really connected to any of them. During the worst point in the crazy cycle I was some how directed to the song, “Forever” by Kari Jobe on my phone. (Wish I could remember how, outside of the Spirit’s leading, of course!) I then looked up the song on YouTube and fell in love with the live version. The next day I had to drive to the doctor, and that very song was playing on my Bethel Live CD! Then- the GRAND FINALE- just happened on Sunday. I went to our church for the first time since Christmas, and I was running late. I found a seat in time to hear the end of one song. Can you guess what the very next song we sang was? Oh yay. It was “Forever”. Is God not so amazing?! 

Well, like I said, I’m not trying to claim that these three steps will cure your fears. They haven’t cured mine, but they’ve been a big help! If you have any thing that helps YOU with overcoming fears, I would love to hear them. I also want to let you know that YOU ARE NOT ALONE if you struggle with fear. I’m right there with you, and I’d love to talk/text/email with you if you want.

You’ve got a friend in me. =)

*** Part 3 coming soon.