Tonight Chuck took Basye to a youth event because a student offered to watch her for me. It’s amazing how taking care of one baby at home feels like a breeze. Why did I ever think having one baby was hard?! Jase is currently “down” but who knows when he’ll actually fall asleep. He is currently in his crib surrounded by a slew of stuffed animals, a blanket, a tractor, a baby toy he stole from his sister, and of course his “Tigy” that he can’t leave home without. Right now things feel peaceful for the first time in quite awhile.

So, I sprained my back this week. As you can imagine it’s been painful. I’ve had back issues come and go before, but this has been different. It is pretty much a constant pain. I am seeing the chiropractor, which helps, but by the end of the day I am aching. I never realized how.much.lifting.I.do.as.a.Mama!!!! So much lifting. And bending. And crouching. And crawling. And reaching. And going up and down the stairs. Being in constant pain has been making me cranky. I must confess I am disappointed in how I’ve reacted as a wife, and as a Mom. My fuse has been extremely short, my patience has been less than thin, and my attitude hasn’t even been close to stellar. Sometimes I scream at Jovie because I can’t stand myself when I yell at Jase, and there’s something inside me that just wants to scream. (Although, Jovie barking during nap time makes my blood absolutely BOIL!)

On top of the constant back pain, with very little rest, Chuck and I are stressed out of our minds over looking for a house. I’ve heard that buying a house is extremely stressful, and that is no joke. We’ve been looking for months and months to no avail. We’ve put offers on two different homes, and obviously did not get either one. So much of my time is taken up with checking my email to see if there’s a new listing, and checking Zillow and Trulia to see if anything is up for sale by owner. I can’t stand how much time looking for a house eats up. I am really tired of looking at the same gross houses over and over and over again online.

The bottom line is, I know for certain God has the perfect house out there for us somewhere. I have no doubts that He will provide, I am just BEYOND tired of waiting. I’m so over this. Our rent went up by $50 a month, last year it went up $30, so that’s $80 more than when we first moved in. We could barely afford it year one, and now we really can’t afford it! So it’s clear God has something else in mind, we just have to wait. The waiting makes me want to scream.

It’s time I scoop myself a big bowl of ice cream, settle into a movie, and slap an ice pack on my back.

Good night friends.